When I took the ticket, I didn’t realize that I would be watching one of the best games the BYU-Utah rivalry has ever seen. I didn’t realize that BYU could look so good in the first quarter only to look so bad for the next two. I didn’t realize that I would spend the entire second and third quarters agonizing over why the Utes always show up to play at these rivalry games while my Cougs seem to fold like a deck of cards. I didn’t realize that a 75 yard drive in the final minute of play could cause such gut-wrenching nervousness. And I didn’t realize that watching a touchdown pass from John Beck to Jonny Harline with the clock at zero could feel so sweet.

Here it is. The pass that almost made me cry it was so beautiful. Go Cougs!

The time has come to change ToweringIntellect.com’s look to something a little less generic. I mean, I kind of want a theme that doesn’t come with the Wordpress install, because thousands of other blogs have the same look. Therefore, bear with me for the next few days while I work on finding and customizing a template to better fit my needs as an individual. Let me know if you have any suggestions for the new look.

Reject a woman and she will never let it go. One of the many defects of their kind. Also, weak arms.
-Dwight Schrute, Assistant Regional Manager, Dunder Mifflin Paper Products

Let me begin by saying that I have a huge amount of respect for the female gender. The very concept of childbirth is enough to win my undying admiration and respect. That said, I have often wondered why I’ve never heard about great female explorers. One would think that the ability to withstand the pains of childbirth, high heels, and body waxing would translate into the ability to survive the extremes of global navigation into the uncharted. In fact, I had chalked the lack of estrogen in exploration up to repressive social practices towards women. My recent experiences, however, have demonstrated that there may be an actual physiological reason for the lack of intrepid exploratory females.

A couple of weeks ago, I went on a date. It was a chilly night, and when my date got into my car, she started to shiver. She cranked the heater and waited for the car to heat up. Several minutes later, as the car reached a comfortable temperature, she turned the heater down. After several minutes of that, she became cold again and turned the heater up. This pattern of turning the heat down and then up went on for the duration. With each cycle, my date got closer and closer to that elusive “perfect temperature” where she was completely comfortable. Finally, as the temperature in the car reached perfection, we pulled into the parking lot of our destination.

As I pondered the irony of this situation, I realized that despite the wide temperature fluctuations throughout the trip, I hadn’t really noticed a huge increase in my discomfort levels. In fact, I was pretty much happy wherever the heat dial was set. In addition, I also realized that I had had this same experience with other girls. In fact, somewhere down the line, I think I subconsciously realized that this temperature dance was going on and I made it my policy to relinquish the environmental controls whenever a girl got in the car.

Think of it this way: When I was in middle school biology, we had to do plant reports. For part of the report, We had to draw these maps and indicate the band around the globe where the plant could live and thrive. Some plants had a really wide band, indicating that they could exist in a fairly wide range of climates. Other plants (usually tropical) had a fairly narrow band. I think that if girls had a band, it would be about the same size as a longitudinal line on the map.

That said, I believe that this limitation makes it incredibly difficult of the female gender to exist outside of their strictly temperature-controlled environment. That’s why you never see a female explorer. And rest assured that if there ever was a great female explorer, she wouldn’t go anywhere without her electric blanket and convection fan.

I should have done this a week ago, but hey, better late than never, right? One of my best buddies, Nate Bagley, is now blogging. So welcome TheBigBags.com to the blogosphere. After all, Life is a Joke.

So first let me apologize to all you who have been expecting a post. I’m in Vegas right now at PubCon 2006 (see JazzcatSEO for more details) so posting is going to continue to be sparse. Sorry. As far as Vegas goes, it’s interesting. I haven’t been on the strip for years. And when I say years, I mean the Luxor was brand new last time I was there. Anyway, we spent some time wandering around the casinos, and I was struck by:

• The large quantity of old people.
• The equally large quantity of bad drivers (coincidence?…)
• The ridiculous amount of money spent on sheer spectacle

Honestly, after seeing so much, what with the flashing lights, ornate decorating, extensive imitation of historical and geographical locales, distracting sounds and delightful smells (aah, cigarettes), I started to get overloaded. I understand what it means to get jaded now. One thing Vegas has yet to learn is that more isn’t always better. Sometimes its just more.

Coming up: Why virtually every great explorer was a man.

I know that this is coming a bit late, but I just had to come clean. As many of you know, I hate Halloween. Here’s why:

• Costumes - Now, it’s not that I actually hate costumes, in fact, I fully support other people wearing them. I just don’t want to put the time and effort into it. What I hate, however, is getting asked eleventy-billion times what costume I’m going to wear, and then, when I tell them that I don’t plan on dressing up, they hassle me about my lack of participation. Boo.
• Pumpkins - I don’t hate pumpkins either. In face, carving pumpkins is one of the few things that I really like about Halloween. What I do hate is the fact that kids think it’s OK to be total punks when October 31st rolls around, so they either kick my pumpkin’s face in, or they smash it on some poor old lady’s driveway. Not so cool. Also, I do hate pumpkin guts.
• Candy- Until this year, this was also a good part of All Hallow’s Eve. Unfortunately, this year I suffered from candy glut, and I am now officially sick of candy, for which travesty I hold Halloween responsible. (Casey Alvarez is also partially responsible for this situation by making me eat 4 Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups at once.)
• Trick-or-Treaters - They have become the bane of my existence, largely because these days, they’re all 15 (and older)-year-old kids who can’t think of anything better to do on Halloween night. And generally, they’re punks. Hello, it’s not cool to go trick-or-treating once you’re old. Trick-or-Treat is for little kids. I think when I have a house, I’m going to give all the old kids that come to my house fake candy. Or dog poo.
• Scary movies - I hate being scared. Period. I like to feel like all is right with the world, like America rocks, and that the good guys win at the end. I don’t like feeling like I’m going to die in my own house.
• Skeletons, zombies, etc. - See scary movies. Also, I think anatomy is gross. A little too much internal organ stuff going on here for me to be entirely comfortable.
• Music - With the sole exception of “Thriller,” all other Halloween music sucks. And in particular, I hate “Monster Mash.” It’s a lame song, no matter how far it takes you back. I don’t want to go back there. Ever.

Anyway, that about rounds out the list. Feel free to try to change my mind. I’d like to hear why you agree/disagree, and why. Until then, Happy Halloween? Bah. Humbug.